on repeat…

last night i had a thought go over and over in my head.

“whom then shall i fear?”

i knew it was from a song, but the next lyric wouldn’t come. just over and over “whom then shall i fear?”

i knew it was in reference to the 23rd Psalm, and the bible verse that says “if God is for us? who can be against us?” popped up in my head for a split second.

but it kept repeating. it’s like a record that was skipping. it was on loop in my brain.

i could even sing the tune, but the chorus of the song was eluding me.

so i dwelt on that. i mulled it over. whom shall i fear? i sang and said it over and over. i thought this isn’t how i talk, it’s almost antiquated language with the whom and the shall. the question morphed into, why am i afraid? who and what am i afraid of?

this morning as i woke and was beginning to write, it hit me. the next lyric.

Oh no, You never let go

Through the calm and through the storm

Oh no, You never let go

In every high and every low

Oh no, You never let go Lord,

You never let go of me

it was just there. but i think God wanted me to focus on the first lyric last night. it’s like He was asking me, “what are you afraid of? I’m here.”

i think so often we avoid doing the things we need to because we are afraid. and that fear overwhelms and cripples us, but we are warriors who serve a God who is like a lion. He is for us, and even though it scares us, we have to step out and believe that.  quite often what we are afraid of is a lie. i’ve heard if you name it, the truth comes out.

i’m afraid of these things. i’m afraid that i will never know the true love of a woman. i’m afraid that my bills won’t get paid every month. i’m afraid of being lonely and alone. i’m afraid that my children will be damaged by divorce and separation. i’m afraid that i will run to things that are temporary fixes. i’m afraid that i’m not seen as a man. i’m afraid that who i really am will be exposed. i’m afraid of failure. i’m afraid of success. i’m afraid of losing everything.

why am i afraid of those things?  they are all lies. i claim to trust God, yet i’m stressed and worried over things that may never happen. or i’m worried about things that happened in the past that color today or the future. and when i do that. when i live in that place of fear. i miss the moment. i miss the right now.

so, whom then shall we fear? God is for us. He is for us. He’s not in opposition. He’s the best player on our team. we need to make sure the playmaker has the ball.

so don’t be afraid. live today. i’m sure going to try. i pray that you do as well.

don’t dwell in fear because He never lets go.

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