a dream of sorts


i have a few dreams for the creative things in my life. i want to make a record of songs written or co-written by me, and i want to make documentaries. i’ll be 43 this summer and sometimes i feel like the window is closing to do those things. there are a lot of songs, but i don’t know how many of them are album worthy, there are some great ideas for movies, but i often put those aside because of time and equipment contraints. i’ve written about fear before and that is a factor as well. i guess my question is, why haven’t i already started to make these dreams a reality? there can be a ton of excuses, but it really comes down to me just doing the things i need to do. not to worry about the money aspect of it. i could easily do a kickstarter campaign. not to worry about the creative part of it. i could easily ask a lot of my friends to contribute. not to worry about the equipment part. i have a good camera, all i need is a sound rig and a lens, heck i could even film on my iphone.

i wonder sometimes why God would allow me to have such great ideas, and not let me finish them, and i think it’s because He wants me to make them happen with other people. i realized this last week that creativity and the work can very easily be about one person. i naturally want the credit for greatness and i don’t have all of the tools to be great by myself. i have some of the components to make something great, but those components need to be shared with others while allowing others to share their greatness with me. i think that is why we need community. i love people, but often i will isolate myself from community. haven’t figured that one out yet. i do know that i am not an island and i need to create in the confines of community. i need to make the time to work with other people. i need that and so do they.

I tend to put down the auteur theory because a lot of people embraced it as a one man/one concept kind of thing, and making a movie is an ensemble.  Clint Eastwood

rough draft of a song inspired by Randy Elrod’s blog post today

Forgotten-Chuck Harris April 12, 2011


Little boy….long red cape

leaping from a tree….knees got scraped

Yeah, he was Superman….he used to fly

he was bulletproof…now he wonders why

chorus 1

the stress of life has brought him down

he’s all grown up he’s on the ground

he wonders will he ever soar again

he’s just forgotten


little girl…wings and fairy dust

sipping tea like she’s….part of the uppercrust

she was a princess…she used to dream

castles and unicorns…now what did that mean

chorus 2

the stress of life has brought her down

she’s all grown up there’s no more crowns

will she ever dream that way again

she’s just forgotten


why do we have the need….to move through life so fast

grow up…act your age…quit playing games…forget about the past

but i remember Ivanhoe and damsels in distress

i remember little girls sipping tea in a party dress

chorus 3

This stress of life won’t bring me down

yes i’m grown up but i’ve been around

you see i’ve been dreaming, i’ll learn to fly again

no i’ve not forgotten

last night…

i got to sit by one of my heroes at dinner.

Randy Elrod has been a distant mentor to me for many years and to finally meet him last night was a huge pleasure.  Thanks to my buddy Jim Drake for setting dinner up and taking me.

i’m so excited about the rest of the week.

so i consider myself artistic…

i love art.  i love music.  i love design.  i love theatre.  i love photography.  i love film.   i love any artistic endeavor.

i long to design sets and lighting.  paint and do graphic design.  write and play music.  write poetry and prose.  i would love to write a script or screenplay.  i would love to film a documentary.

i’ve been a musician since grade school and still make my living doing that, but yesterday and today…for the first time…i painted.

it’s not a great painting,  and you can’t actually call it painting, because i didn’t use a brush.  i just had a canvas and an idea.

this picture isn’t going to hang in a gallery or a museum.  it’s just for my office, but it’s the start of me living out some of my creative dreams.

Picture 002

i painted it with several guitar picks that i superglued to some pencil stubs.

Picture 001

so i feel as if i accomplished something.

i feel as if my biggest struggle in being artistic is that i have all of these whacked out ideas in my head, but no real way of fleshing them out.  i want to unleash these ideas, but need help.

what is the big creative dream that you have that’s not being fulfilled?