that’s me blowing dust off of this blog….



now for the 8-9 of you who have read this blog for a while, it’s probably no surprise to you that i’m popping up again. i know that my writing is sporadic. a few years ago, i even tried to make a commitment to write every day for a year. that fizzled out, so i’m just going to try and write as my heart allows me to. during lent, i am adding instead of denying. i’m adding exercise a few days a week and i figure that means working out my mental muscles as well. so i’m going to read more and write as well. i’m hoping that it makes a difference in someone’s life, maybe yours, maybe mine. dang, it feels good to write in lowercase again.

sorry for the neglect. i hope to do better.


it’s good.

i guess my last few blogs have made it seem as if i am sad or a little depressed. 

that is not the case.

in spite of hardship and loneliness, i am actually in a really good place. far from where i was 6 months ago. way far from where i was a year or two years ago.

i am in the process of trying to get a better hold on some financial things, and i’m dreaming of creating again. there is still a bit of fear over the creating, but that will go away as i just do it. writing every day is a start. 

i looked back over my blog stats and noticed a pattern. when i was in a good place, i was writing. people were reading. i can look at the dates and see that. 

so my prayer is that in humility and love, i will create. and i won’t fear, and i won’t care if anyone likes or sees it. i am creating for me in the hopes that it blesses others. i don’t think that is selfish, but maybe it is.  maybe i should create for others in the hopes that it blesses me.

i guess that’s something i need to figure out. there are so many reasons we do things or don’t do them. do i love the process or the result more? do i know enough about myself to know what i should and shouldn’t be spending time to create? am i constantly re-examining what i’m built for as an excuse instead of just doing it. 

i do know that i am happiest when i find amazing words in my heart to put down on a page. when i get to play music with my friends or even strangers. when i get to work with people in creative ways. and i like to think that when i’m happy and filled with joy. other people are too.